An inspired Poem : Care to comment?

Question: An inspired Poem : Care to comment!?

The birds nest was in a cherry tree
In full blossom it was magnificent
what a lovely place to build a nest
And when the babies look around
they will see that they are truly blessed

But, plans in life are seldom certain
even the best ones may have to rest
but what of that final curtain
we wish even that too, was blessed

If only our parents who built are nest
Would build somewhere that we could rest
Would birds that lived in cherry trees
Would they strive always to do their best!?

Shall we always look for peace in life!?
And be content with our resting place!?
Or on the dawn that we take flight
Believe that life has a sweet embrace!?

And what if we don’t find it straightaway
Or another evades and steals our song
Have you forgotten how to pray!?
And how God makes right, when we’ve been wrongedWww@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Thanks Gideon!. Tis true i have forgotten to pray, that's why my soul is incomplete!. I shall now take a shower amidst this fever and then!.!.!.pray!. =)Www@QuestionHome@Com

It sounds generic!. Nothing unique about it!. What bothered me was the first stanza's 4th and 5th lines!. By the time I got to reading into the 5th I was out of breath, and it didn't flow!. And what's with five lines in the first part whilst the rest have only four!? You get a C grade!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

A little old-fashioned, but I like the central idea!. Who are you writing for!? Yourself, or a decent-minded public!? (It's important you focus on this question)!. I hope your muse continues to visit you! A great start!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

That is good, we shouldn't be looking for our ideal existance in this world!. We can only have paradise in heaven!. Inspiring and very deep some folks here are just too critical!. I want to encourage you to keep writing shows real promise!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It' write on!.!. Don't lose focus on the trival things that the responders may say!.!. You aim is true and that all that matters !.!.AmenWww@QuestionHome@Com

Sorry, I think it's saccarine sweet and facile!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Well I like it!.
I read the other one from DD!.
You did good!.
Nice work:)Www@QuestionHome@Com

Not impressed; it doesn't flow!. Poor rhyming!.
What was the inspiration!? Surely not a class A substance!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

i think that was beautiful ! another good way of saying have faith in god and jesus and you will be ok no matter what comes at you in life!! god blessWww@QuestionHome@Com

I like it!. Keep writing!.God BlessWww@QuestionHome@Com

What a wisely and truthfully stated ode to God!Www@QuestionHome@Com

these do not help others learn our languageWww@QuestionHome@Com