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Question: My first attempt at a rondeau!. Will you read!?
BEST FRIENDS
My memory, I find you there,
and there is time to stop, and stare!.
I keep you in this perfect place,
so mind and heart cannot embrace
the knowledge that I cannot bear!.
Remember our sweet secret lair,
we'd hide and eat on bandit's fare,
with dirty hands and muddied face,
we promised friends forever!.
I can't reach you, I'm in despair,
Your eyes so cold, bereft of flare;
Beloved, fallen from the grace,
untouched now, neither time nor space
can bring you back to keep your swear!.!.!.
We promised friends forever!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
It's a beautiful poem and everything is right on from rhyme to meter, however, there is a problem with the form in that the refrain is supposed to be a portion of the first line!. Check this example!.
http://www!.elfwood!.com/farp/thewriting/2!.!.!."we promised friends forever" needs to begin the first line of the first stanza!.
Other than this small thing!.!.!.it's lovely
Www@QuestionHome@Com
I am not familiar with this structure!.!.!.but the poem is beautiful!. It is a tragedy when friendship ends!.!.!.I am going through something of the sort right now!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Not quite there as a Rondeau, perhaps this definition will help!.
A French verse form of 10 or 13 lines running on two rhymes; the opening phrase is repeated as the refrain of the second and third stanzas!.
RobertWww@QuestionHome@Com
said the bee to the flower!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
If I knew the definition of this term of poetry, I would be more able to comment on the question put forth!.!.!. I don't, so I can't but can say that this poem is very good!. It explains the way feel often!.!.!. again, something I have been going through lately!.!.!.
Blessed BeWww@QuestionHome@Com
It's not a rondeau ["Help me rondeau, help, help me rondeau!."] but it's a soap bubble of a poem!. It's beautiful to look at, but if you try to grab hold of its meaning, it will disappear!.Www@QuestionHome@Com