Okay okay...last one....any good?

Question:At last I shall find peace in the failing facade of comfort that is my bed.
The absence of sound and light will linger in the night, and my consciousness will be brought to its knees in useless protest.
My nights of endless insomnia fade into the gray.
The space between I and my mind.
Stumbling on in the distance.
I shall find that peace, that quiet of sleep.
My unconscious form, resting and recuperating. but my mind shall race, thinking thoughts of nightmares.
Bringing me back to the human realm of misery that I so helplessly fight back against.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: At last I shall find peace in the failing facade of comfort that is my bed.
The absence of sound and light will linger in the night, and my consciousness will be brought to its knees in useless protest.
My nights of endless insomnia fade into the gray.
The space between I and my mind.
Stumbling on in the distance.
I shall find that peace, that quiet of sleep.
My unconscious form, resting and recuperating. but my mind shall race, thinking thoughts of nightmares.
Bringing me back to the human realm of misery that I so helplessly fight back against.

I like this. Short and to the point. A contrast to the theme of insomnia. I would change part of the 8th line though. "thinking thoughts" should be maybe "my mind shall race on thoughts of nightmares" or "my mind shall race, thinking of nightmares."

You are not writing from experience but from some idealized world that doesn't exist.

Recommend that you write about real stuff.

Absences don't linger, things do.

Too abstract "thinking thoughts of nightmares" and remote from the feelings.

Keep trying.

I think you are very talented. Good job and very vivid imagery. Keep writing you are good.