I really like my short poem.....please comment, thank you?

Question:Beginning and end

Shady clouds break out
the white-lit sky is hid away,
rain showers fall from heaven
as the eeriness turns to gray,
flashing lights a sudden outburst
Thunder echoes overhead,
White strikes to the floor
As the thunderstorm goes dead

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Beginning and end

Shady clouds break out
the white-lit sky is hid away,
rain showers fall from heaven
as the eeriness turns to gray,
flashing lights a sudden outburst
Thunder echoes overhead,
White strikes to the floor
As the thunderstorm goes dead

pretty good. I'd take out a couple of words though:

Shady clouds break out,
White-lit sky is hid away,
Rain showers fall from heaven,
the eeriness turns to gray.

Flashing Lights - a sudden outburst
Thunder echoes overhead
Whiteness strikes the floor:
A thunderstorm is bred.

But that's just me...

Wow I love the imagery yet I do not feel I get the meaning of the poem.
Maybe it's just me =/

yeah thats really good. what does the last line mean? (i thought mabey the end of the earth?)

really nice don't be say end this is just beginning thanks for sharing

Personally speaking ..... I feel it sounds more like some kind of weather forecast gone wrong ! - There needs to be more context and body to the poem as it is so short

its good