Help SOS, my new poem, please rate?

Question:This poem is about people in 3rd world countries who are poor and helpless. Hope you can image what im writing to.

Help SOS!!

Family torn apart
Heart wrenching to see,
Unfortunate people
Living their lives
With little dignity,
Inexistent education
Is a way of their lives
They work hard to earn little
Its the way the world lies,
With an irreplaceable heart
They hide away the pain
With an uncertain future
They've no strength to regain,
Tragedy strikes daily
Often through disease or poverty
These people seek help
They're living in a 3rd world country,
Innocent young ones losing there lives
Hep is over the horizon
But their hope never dies,
Strong willed people
That they must be
Living a hard life
To support a family.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: This poem is about people in 3rd world countries who are poor and helpless. Hope you can image what im writing to.

Help SOS!!

Family torn apart
Heart wrenching to see,
Unfortunate people
Living their lives
With little dignity,
Inexistent education
Is a way of their lives
They work hard to earn little
Its the way the world lies,
With an irreplaceable heart
They hide away the pain
With an uncertain future
They've no strength to regain,
Tragedy strikes daily
Often through disease or poverty
These people seek help
They're living in a 3rd world country,
Innocent young ones losing there lives
Hep is over the horizon
But their hope never dies,
Strong willed people
That they must be
Living a hard life
To support a family.

Your message is valid but you're telling not showing. Telling us puts your message in our minds and it will slip out quickly but showing us puts it in our hearts. If your able to reach someone's heart the message will stick. Yah get me?

(Sorry if it came out like I was preaching.)

it was good

8/10

It's touching but you need to read this and see where you need help to fix it. There lives should be their lives. Hep should be help. Other then this it's a very good poem. I do however, think they have strength to regain what they have lost. They are a smart people and they know what has to be done they just need that chance to do it. So don't sell them out so short.

loved it my fav poem yet

i liked it theres definitely alot of emotion in it