critiques for my poem???

Question:These marks upon her wrists
These tales upon her soul
of one night...
then many years
of one heartbreak...
then many sorrows
The damage leaks into her fervent beauty
Once uncaptured and unchallenged,
now torn and broken.
No longer innocent
No longer loving
No longer living

*please keep in mind that this is a rough draft that was written in about five minutes. I will most likely be making some changes but would like to hear some opinions on it.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: These marks upon her wrists
These tales upon her soul
of one night...
then many years
of one heartbreak...
then many sorrows
The damage leaks into her fervent beauty
Once uncaptured and unchallenged,
now torn and broken.
No longer innocent
No longer loving
No longer living

*please keep in mind that this is a rough draft that was written in about five minutes. I will most likely be making some changes but would like to hear some opinions on it.

Good. Its kind of confusing, but for the most part well written. Very deep and powerful.