The wrong turn It is a bit dark hope you like it.?

Question:As i sat there that day i told my friend i had to get away .
When i was walking around the block i seen the darkest shadow who looked so hollow i began to run.

Who is he and why is he after me He started walking faster
as i began to run and with his laugh he said i will out last her.
I kept saying to myself this is a dream ' but i could not even scream '

I screamed and kicked and he hit me with a brick and that's when he shot me .
I really wanted to run but when i seen that gun it paralyzed me .

Now he was dragging me away as i silently began to pray
as my body was getting weaker .
As i lay in the street i seen that boy as they said she;s already dead and covered up my head.

Now is the day they will put me in the grave and i keep thinking why after all these years of sadness i want life.

As i lay here now the little boy comes around and he touches me with his tears and says' mom then i realized he is my son that died when i was young and we went together

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: As i sat there that day i told my friend i had to get away .
When i was walking around the block i seen the darkest shadow who looked so hollow i began to run.

Who is he and why is he after me He started walking faster
as i began to run and with his laugh he said i will out last her.
I kept saying to myself this is a dream ' but i could not even scream '

I screamed and kicked and he hit me with a brick and that's when he shot me .
I really wanted to run but when i seen that gun it paralyzed me .

Now he was dragging me away as i silently began to pray
as my body was getting weaker .
As i lay in the street i seen that boy as they said she;s already dead and covered up my head.

Now is the day they will put me in the grave and i keep thinking why after all these years of sadness i want life.

As i lay here now the little boy comes around and he touches me with his tears and says' mom then i realized he is my son that died when i was young and we went together

great
sherry what ever you do dont look to the bright side
come over to the dark side
come there is nothing great about the light

wow, i loved the ending.

i feel though it didnt describe the situation enough and that you should check the rhythm you are going for, because i couldnt quite find it. (sorry if i was just reading it wrong)

but overall it is great!

It is touching in a morbid sense and I think it is time to skow us a cheerful side of yourself.
Don't dwell on dark thoughts, they will consume you.

Dear Sherry,I told u to look bright side of life and drive away all negetive thinking from ur life,throw all negative thoughts MILES away from ur mind,and look at nature,beauty of the world and only think about positive things happend in ur life,all the sorrows and sadness will run away miles from u.

That is so touching, it made me almost cry. That is really good writing!!!!

that was a touching and wonderful poem. your on a roll.

sincerely
chris