I wrote this while I was moving furniture. It came to me while I was working.. H

Question:"wonder"

I wonder often where I might have been today,
but like a Christie mystery, I don't have a clue.
My life it seems to sail on, it's own merry way.
I just wonder how these things can go so very wrong..

People often say,that justice delayed is justice denied,
but time keeps right on moving, keep on keeping on.
From the very moment, that mom gave birth to me,
choices that I've often made, I don't seem to recall.

As I worked my way through life, fighting every day,
I've seen all I've worked for, somehow pass me by.
I never really thought that l would ever count for much,
always knowing deep inside, life was way too tough.

So many times I risked it all, by rolling crooked dice,
and yet all the times I tried, snake eyes stayed away.
Please don't take this story wrong, I look forward to the sun,
I failed every time, I tried to take my life. I really do belong.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: "wonder"

I wonder often where I might have been today,
but like a Christie mystery, I don't have a clue.
My life it seems to sail on, it's own merry way.
I just wonder how these things can go so very wrong..

People often say,that justice delayed is justice denied,
but time keeps right on moving, keep on keeping on.
From the very moment, that mom gave birth to me,
choices that I've often made, I don't seem to recall.

As I worked my way through life, fighting every day,
I've seen all I've worked for, somehow pass me by.
I never really thought that l would ever count for much,
always knowing deep inside, life was way too tough.

So many times I risked it all, by rolling crooked dice,
and yet all the times I tried, snake eyes stayed away.
Please don't take this story wrong, I look forward to the sun,
I failed every time, I tried to take my life. I really do belong.

This has so much going for it. For example, like a Christie mystery (the internal rhyme is great) and it encapsulates what life is to us all - so much more powerful than - 'Life is a mystery' - it is these little gems that I look for in a good poem.
(its own merry way - you don't need the apostrophe)

keeps right on, moving, keeps on keeping on...........the repitition emphasises the years rolling by with nothing changing.

Think about changing the mom bit - to give a distanting/adult view....for example From the very moment of my unwelcomed/unannounced birth- something like that.

the word 'wrong' spoils the last verse - it is ungrammatical,which wouldn't matter in a vernacular poem but here it jars (at least to my ears) - my suggestion....Please don't misunderstand my words/my story/my verse (try a semi-colon here to create a small pause) I look forward to the sun
I'VE failed every time. (I have failed...

This poem has a quiet but powerful influence upon the reader.
Thank you

thats very good

i like it :]

i think it lacks flow.. but i like what the poem says

i liked it...the pattern worked well with the message...very well executed...thank you for sharing

It's great with not very much errors. :)
Have a great time.

I think it's beautiful and I can totally relate to it right now. I couldn't have read this at a better time. Thank you!

It's ok.

Yes, you do belong...

It's good Hun.
I like it.
Nice work:)

Bingo! You nailed it.

Yes, even though it seems hard to believe, with the pain and the suffering, the trials and the tribulations. I believe everyone is put on this earth for some purpose. It is so hard to see sometime, but it is lurking around somewhere. Your fight has been worthwhile, you make so many people happy with your beautiful words. You are a blessing to many. There is more in store for you I am sure. God Bless you. Thank you for not taking your life, and for your poetry.

This one is good like it is. It tells us a story of choices, of trials and failures and trials again, and it comes to a simple conclusion; I really do belong.
Good work.