Do like this poem? or is this even a poem? i just wrote it randomly well i was b

Question:Dancing on this marshmallow feeling kind of yellow, in a world that’s so mellow, she says hello with her breath like a breeze blowing through the tree’s across all the leaves, so softly your voice moves over me, hello I reply well I sit back and sigh feeling a little high, sitting in this green scenery of leaves and trees with her across from me like a little tease, she stairs with a glare and says its been too long since I talked like a song chatting along so mellow yellow speaking to a fellow.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Dancing on this marshmallow feeling kind of yellow, in a world that’s so mellow, she says hello with her breath like a breeze blowing through the tree’s across all the leaves, so softly your voice moves over me, hello I reply well I sit back and sigh feeling a little high, sitting in this green scenery of leaves and trees with her across from me like a little tease, she stairs with a glare and says its been too long since I talked like a song chatting along so mellow yellow speaking to a fellow.

Dancing on this marshmellow
feeling kind of yellow,
in a world so mellow,
she says hello

her breath like a breeze
blowing through the trees
across all the leaves
( don't know where the next phrase rhymes, sorry I don't get the approximate rhyme here)

just keep trying to separate your thoughts into more distinct lines, otherwise it is pretty darn good for a random thought :)

(sorry, slow people like myself have problems understanding paragraph poems with internal rhyme, but if that is what you were going for, then you definitely achieved it!!! )

I hope this answers your question.

Best wishes,
:)

aw its cute. i like it. it sounds like it could be a song, sort of beatles-ish lyrics? anyways its pretty cool :]

hmm I liked it. it had a sorta...... interesting topic and interesting flow. And yeah it is a poem or would be if you changed the format a little and made more lines than a "clump" the "clump" sorta takes away from the wanting to read it, the hook of the readers, and it messes with the flow. so yeah rearange the format a bit and i think it would be a nice sweet little poem :) I liked though! nice job for randomly writing it

Definitely seperate it into lines. It sounds more like a rap than a poem, I think.

Interesting, very, very interesting!