That first one felt so good...I tried another. How is this one.?

Question:"i saw your face"

Looking up I saw your face,
yet now it's just an empty space.
I blink my eyes and look again,
there's now no one where you had been.

My mind is playing games with me,
it's you I want to see.
You come and go, without a sound,
to you my heart is bound..

I reach out for you, in the thick of night,
was it really you, or just a trick of light.
I can feel your heat, it is still right here,
but I look and see, you are nowhere near.

Come to me my angel, who must I appease,
I beg to you to hear my call, I am on my knees.
Could it really be, I've finally lost my mind,
I walk the streets all night, it's you I have to find.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: "i saw your face"

Looking up I saw your face,
yet now it's just an empty space.
I blink my eyes and look again,
there's now no one where you had been.

My mind is playing games with me,
it's you I want to see.
You come and go, without a sound,
to you my heart is bound..

I reach out for you, in the thick of night,
was it really you, or just a trick of light.
I can feel your heat, it is still right here,
but I look and see, you are nowhere near.

Come to me my angel, who must I appease,
I beg to you to hear my call, I am on my knees.
Could it really be, I've finally lost my mind,
I walk the streets all night, it's you I have to find.

Kick a55 opening stanza!!!!!!!!

I totally loved the "ghostly feel" to this, kind of a haunting love poem of "missing you' and perhaps a subtle betrayal <3

Pen On my friend @)~>~

wow..that was really good! did you write that yourself? because if it was you should be very proud!!
:]

I like. The last stanza to me though needs rework. You went from 7 to 8 beats per line to 11 to 12?

i love it! the rythum needs works but other wise its perfect!

i think its good

Super! Filled with anguish.