What do you honestly think of this poem?

Question:I was contemplating.
I lost my pen, my favorite pen.
The pen I loved dearly, gone.
And then I think of something.
Why hadn't I thought about this before?

I look at my wallet, I open it,
Gently,
Gently, I open it.
Zilch, nil, diddly-squat.
It's contents are swimming in nothingness.

I want to write about this loss,
But I cannot.
And then, as if on cue,
A little bird came to my window,
It spread its wings and sang his song.

And I listened to this little fellow,
Who does not know how it feels to lose a pen.
Because he is telling me something.
You haven't lost anything,
You haven't lost anything at all.

*An idea popped into my head just as I was about to sleep. I practically dragged myself to the laptop just so I wouldn't forget. Haha. :-)

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I was contemplating.
I lost my pen, my favorite pen.
The pen I loved dearly, gone.
And then I think of something.
Why hadn't I thought about this before?

I look at my wallet, I open it,
Gently,
Gently, I open it.
Zilch, nil, diddly-squat.
It's contents are swimming in nothingness.

I want to write about this loss,
But I cannot.
And then, as if on cue,
A little bird came to my window,
It spread its wings and sang his song.

And I listened to this little fellow,
Who does not know how it feels to lose a pen.
Because he is telling me something.
You haven't lost anything,
You haven't lost anything at all.

*An idea popped into my head just as I was about to sleep. I practically dragged myself to the laptop just so I wouldn't forget. Haha. :-)

All art is subjective.Do you like it? Does it bring a certain feeling to mind. Do you read it and feel good about writing it?? Don't worry about other peoples honest opinion.After all it is still only an opinion.

I like it.It made me feel good and I'm glad you got out of bed to write it down. But, it's only my opinion.

I don't know how to describe it, but it was really good;]

I wish I could write poetry as good as you ;P

hehe, it's some how funny but adorable, it's so beautiful
i have saved it on my pc, it's realy nice, quite wonderful !!!
:D:D:D:D

its ok, i cant really relate but thats doesnt mean much. Poetry is more about expressing yourself than what other people think about it.

I like it. Really, it's great.

hey
this is a good one. appears to have come very spontaneously. though the format and the tone do not make it a poem in the right sense, the flow of feelings is quite natural.

Well, your poem is good. But i think the idea is not that clear.You lost a pen and the bird telling you have not lost anything at all. Perhaps it means that in life, you must not regret about things lost, but must move on,accepting the loss.Your poem have a natural flow to it.

I must apprecaite you for your effort. Because iam somewhat lazy and if an idea had ocured to me in night, i would let it go,thinking what the heck, i would write it down the next day. But i would have forgotten it by then. Lol.

lol i feel like i need to be more organized

I like it.
Nice work:)

It's really good.

it was good but a bit redundant, to be honest. In other words there were a few superflous words and lines eg.
"I lost my pen, my favourite pen
The pen I loved dearly, gone"
Both linse mean almost exactly the same thing. I know that can be called a style but it only makes the poem less concise than it could be. Which is part of the style of poetry. The imagery of the poem is good. I can see most images clearly. Also the idea behind the poem is either too hidden or too shallow....I'm not sure which. It's a story but it lacks the depth or exciting word play of most poetry. I can definetly hear your voice in this poem which is good.

Overall though, a bit more work.
Diregard this if it doesn't help you...take it on board if it does.

not bad

could be more descriptive

Ironic, that you wrote a poem on a laptop about losing a pen. I was looking for some deeper meaning. Does this mean that now the computer is mightier than the sword and the pen is obsolete?