song I wrote what do you think?

Question:I been searching in my dreams , All through the night
Nothings what it seems , I guess you left my sight,
All I hear are screams , That you left inside my head
Maybe I was wrong , I didn't mean what i said
You said I am strong , Maybe you are right
But baby I'm not tonight.... OOooohh not tonight

I have the sound in my head and I need more words but what do you think of this?

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I been searching in my dreams , All through the night
Nothings what it seems , I guess you left my sight,
All I hear are screams , That you left inside my head
Maybe I was wrong , I didn't mean what i said
You said I am strong , Maybe you are right
But baby I'm not tonight.... OOooohh not tonight

I have the sound in my head and I need more words but what do you think of this?

I think it's brilliant, and should be called "Not tonight."
Keep going!!!

pretty good

Its good :)
A+

Actually, you might want to focus little more on word choice.

All I hear are screams , That you left inside my head

Maybe say...
The ones you left in my head.

And might want to take out the "Maybe"..
Your choice though.

Good Luck!

VERY GOOD!

I been searching in my dreams , All through the night
Nothings what it seems , I guess you left my sight,
All I hear are screams , That you left inside my head
Maybe I was wrong , I didn't mean what i said
You said I am strong , Maybe you are right
But baby I'm not tonight.... OOooohh not tonight

You left me all alone,
while you went into the park, enjoyed yourself, and left me feeling dark.
Its hard to stay with you, when you keep going out and leaven in blue.I should've realized I am too naive for you.
I should've realized I was wrong, You said all that,
but your words weren't strong.