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Position:Home>Poetry> I wrote a poem for mine & my boyfriends 2 yr anniversary as one of his gifts....Question:My Lover The ice shining in the pale moonlight, Is nothing like my lover’s eyes, The joy inside a child’s heart, Is nothing like my lover’s kiss. The melody of a hundred song birds, Is nothing like my lover’s voice. My lover cannot be compared To such worldly things Just as love cannot be conveyed with mere human words. **If you like this one, please check out my other two poems. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;... http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;... Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: My Lover The ice shining in the pale moonlight, Is nothing like my lover’s eyes, The joy inside a child’s heart, Is nothing like my lover’s kiss. The melody of a hundred song birds, Is nothing like my lover’s voice. My lover cannot be compared To such worldly things Just as love cannot be conveyed with mere human words. **If you like this one, please check out my other two poems. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;... http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;... I like the second stanza and the last to lines of the first stanza, but the first two comparisons you make seem like you just quickly wrote them down or something. They don't make sense to me. Are you saying your lover's eyes are cold, dark, and pale white? And I don't think a child's joy is much like a kiss. I mean sure, kisses have joy, but a child's joy is...innocent, young, ignorant. A kiss is more mature. I mean, I know you're saying that your lover's (blank) is nothing like these things and I had no problem with them until the last two lines of the first stanza because then I realized you were saying that even though these things are beautiful, joyful, the same, etc., they're not as beautiful, joyful or whatever as your lover's (blank). Got that, right? But i just don't see ice shining in pale moonlight in eyes unless the eyes are dead and milky white. Sorry, just pointing these things out. I may be completely wrong here. So sorry if I am. Do explain, if you want to email me or whatever and put me right. Edited Version My Lover The ice shining in the pale moonlight, Is nothing like the twinkle in my lover’s eyes, The joy a butterfly's wings express, Is nothing like the flutter my lover's kiss leaves, The melody of a hundred song birds, Is nothing like my lover’s voice. Report It * You must be logged into Answers to add comments. Sign in or Register. Other Answers (3) |