Luver to Lover?

Question:A different style for me. Comments?

Luver to Lover

I'm telling you I luv you
but you ain’t gave nothing back.
This is who I am, splintered and real.
Why can't you see?
Your eyes always moving
dreaming of places far
with carpets and cars
and toys galore.
But I am here, I am real,
I am your rock.
But you walk,
look away and move away.
Don't you dare turn around,
I'm talking to you!
Time you figur’d what you need
cause I'm moving on.
I have my dreams and ain’t
nothing going to stop me!
Splintered lives no more,
I'm still going and I ain’t stopping
no more.
That’s right…no more!

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: A different style for me. Comments?

Luver to Lover

I'm telling you I luv you
but you ain’t gave nothing back.
This is who I am, splintered and real.
Why can't you see?
Your eyes always moving
dreaming of places far
with carpets and cars
and toys galore.
But I am here, I am real,
I am your rock.
But you walk,
look away and move away.
Don't you dare turn around,
I'm talking to you!
Time you figur’d what you need
cause I'm moving on.
I have my dreams and ain’t
nothing going to stop me!
Splintered lives no more,
I'm still going and I ain’t stopping
no more.
That’s right…no more!

Very heart-breaking! Broke me down to tears...

If music is the food of love play on .

Well done! You've captured my feelings on more than one occasion. "No more!" - I agree.

"But I am here, I am real,
I am your rock.
But you walk,
look away and move away.
Don't you dare turn around,
I'm talking to you!"

i felt like in those lines you REALLY got angry.. and it's good.. the poem started a little calm, not too calm of course.. and little by little the degree of anger bcz of heartbreak i'm sure got higher and higher.. and i love the way you ended the poem! it was perfectly done! you didn't calm things at all, and that worked out great for this poem!

nicely done!

i liked it
simple yet it says everything

This can't be the end. There has to be a response from the other. What a great work. I would luv to hear the response though *hint* *hint*

omg that is deep