A poem i wrote just now?

Question:Watch the birds build their homes
Without cement or construction cones
Piece by piece, they'll progress
What little things it takes to build their nests
And what little things we don't see,
really have an effect on me.
Can you see them too?
Little things make me like you.
And if we're right, then itsy bitsy spider was never so itsy bitsy!
The colors in the rainbow might clash, but they're still so pretty!
And at night, when the snow begins to form,
We understand that the sun isn't the only thing that keeps us warm!

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Watch the birds build their homes
Without cement or construction cones
Piece by piece, they'll progress
What little things it takes to build their nests
And what little things we don't see,
really have an effect on me.
Can you see them too?
Little things make me like you.
And if we're right, then itsy bitsy spider was never so itsy bitsy!
The colors in the rainbow might clash, but they're still so pretty!
And at night, when the snow begins to form,
We understand that the sun isn't the only thing that keeps us warm!

You should stop at line eight but change it a bit with some elaboration. In lines 3 and 5 the contraction stops the meter.
and in line 7 your question is contradictory to the main theme of the poem. But I like it.

How about this?

"Watch the birds as they build their homes
without cement or construction cones
piece by piece they do progress
from little things they build their nests
And what little things we do not see
bind together to have an effect on me
Can you see them? And if you do
They are the things that make me like you."

Thanks for letting me write with you.

I like it, expecally the first part.
Very nice work:)

ok then i wanna fly like a bird in the sky nice poem

it was kool...

got kinda messed up in the end...

8 and a half/10

it was still awesome though.

the first like 6 lines are the best..so are the last two.. the rest kinda fell apart... no offense im no expert

x]x[

It's wonderful; the last line is my favorite. You obviously love writing and do it very well. You might want to experiment with taking out the capitals at the beginning of lines, running lines like sentences and playing with where you break them... it sounds like you're ready for it.
I like your poem very much, and hope you keep writing.

This is a great poem,

mdg

Very good for a thirteen year old. Keep writing. You've got talent.