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Position:Home>Poetry> Thoughts and Feedback for my Poem?Question:The Essence Of Impression Some through experiment compose rhythms Pictures–aesthetic drugs Smoke and glass shimmer, dazzle Surreal passion Created from imagined harmony Angels scream glorious color Fiery joy An empty canvas like Life & Death Metaphor Drunk with impression, above every sense Pain frees us, but we never feel Live through ink Write –Paint– Draw Wild grace Be bold about who you are Why must we always break–give up? Out of the music they appear .....black ? Julia Grace Please tell me your thoughts and feedback. How did this poem make you feel? What image(s) does it bring to mind? What do you like about it? Is there any part which you struggle with? --------------------- For More of My Poetry and Written Work See: http://lifeasawriter.blogspot.com My work is copyright & not public-domain. It cannot be reproduced, blogged, copied, altered, printed, or saved without my explicit written permission. Copyright infringement is stealing; please do not steal my work Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: The Essence Of Impression Some through experiment compose rhythms Pictures–aesthetic drugs Smoke and glass shimmer, dazzle Surreal passion Created from imagined harmony Angels scream glorious color Fiery joy An empty canvas like Life & Death Metaphor Drunk with impression, above every sense Pain frees us, but we never feel Live through ink Write –Paint– Draw Wild grace Be bold about who you are Why must we always break–give up? Out of the music they appear .....black ? Julia Grace Please tell me your thoughts and feedback. How did this poem make you feel? What image(s) does it bring to mind? What do you like about it? Is there any part which you struggle with? --------------------- For More of My Poetry and Written Work See: http://lifeasawriter.blogspot.com My work is copyright & not public-domain. It cannot be reproduced, blogged, copied, altered, printed, or saved without my explicit written permission. Copyright infringement is stealing; please do not steal my work That was quite nice, and impressionist piece, making the title a bit of a pun, or at least double entendre, I guess. I quite liked how you omitted punctuation to the point of absolute necessity. Gives the poem a feeling of ether, surreal, as I believe was the intention. I really liked the phrase "aesthetic drug" in describing art. Very nice indeed. There are some complex figures of speech in the poem, mixes of simile, metaphor, imagery. I enjoyed. You should post more. Problem line: "Pain frees us but we never feel" I don't quite get what that means. Is "feel" the right word? Do you mean eased, or relieved? not sure, maybe I'm just not getting the line, but I was thinking "Pain frees us but is never eased," then the solution, as the poem relates: art, self-confidence and toil. It made me think. I pictured angels screaming with fire behind them for some weird reason. I struggled with: 'An empty canvas like Life & Death Metaphor' 'Cause the first line was a simile... |