Another Misery Poem - Yay Or Nay?

Question:I am stoned
by many a reckless word
as in ancient times
and no one has heard

People looked
as the deed was hushed
for they chose not to see
and I remain crushed

Music played
songs of dance to follow
while alone I stood
bruised, battered, and hollow

Please Elders
your wisdom do impart
of liquors to heal
this sickened heart

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I am stoned
by many a reckless word
as in ancient times
and no one has heard

People looked
as the deed was hushed
for they chose not to see
and I remain crushed

Music played
songs of dance to follow
while alone I stood
bruised, battered, and hollow

Please Elders
your wisdom do impart
of liquors to heal
this sickened heart

Nice poem...yay, but very sad and melancholy. I think that sometimes people don't even realize how their words can crush. You've captured this feeling well and I hope you haven't had to suffer it. I think the best liquors for this kind of sickness are the kind words of those who love you.

yay

wow.........who hurt you?????

yay. =D

i like this [:

thats really good. what inspired you?

try someting that makes you hapy in life that one is good dont get me wrong but its a little abit deep most people like poems about nature and all that but you obviously good at it so kee it up huni x

yay :)

You miss the point in making a sweeping generalization. This person is hurt by others, by their nasty words, the fact that people do not care and cover things up!

LOVE IT!

Liquored up and stoned always worked for me...

While not strictly a fan, I get it. Certainly expressing/venting should be part of anyones healing, as opposed to digging in deeper to keep anger and pain alive.

It's a bit abstract in that the reader has to place themselves in that TIME, assuming a primal culture and some notion of Elders being the wiser, but those references at beginning and end, don't correlate with the theme of the piece.

I can't say Yay, but wouldn't say NAY either.

Steven Wolf
Just my two "sense"

yay. i think it's really good, very emotional.

~sig~
7 days without soccer makes one weak.

yay....yay....and yaaaaaaaaaaay

Yay! But the poem is superb. I love it!

I like the way it is worded. Although it is about misery but the message is crystal clear and loaded.

Thanks for sharing. You are indeed a good poet forever.

Have a great day! May you compose as many good poems as you can. I like your style.

I think this is your darkest poem yet. I like it, it paints a picture. One day you will have to tell me what the liquors to heal are.

Yes, words hurt more than "sticks and stones." I can't remember who said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but silence breaks my heart." You've expressed this concept also in your second stanza, "as the deed was hushed." So, words, or even the lack of healing words crush the heart. Wonderful poem, clearly Yay!!

Yay i loved it and you speak from your broken heart and your tattered soul and bravo for you to come thru it with the gift to write about it and to never have to go thru this hell again; as i never go thru my tortured hell again either Amen...

yess i love it. its very emotional what happened to you...?

I really like it. You have captured some of the pain felt, and I have an image of a person standing alone, suffering, begging for help. I say Yay!

been battered an bruised
got lines i can't use
been sold down the river
my head won't deliver

this horse is ready to run
gona be second to none
with a fat wind in my sails
ya see nothing but my tail