Do you like my poem? I struggled with it for what seems an age.?

Question:My life was black, black, black.
Then I saw a seagull.
So I bought some fish and chips.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: My life was black, black, black.
Then I saw a seagull.
So I bought some fish and chips.

It's good, but I think it needs more salt, perhaps a dash of vinegar, but otherwise, lunch is chosen.....

No.....not good.

You could have said he pooped in your eye.

No offense at all, but struggle should be put aside until a tide washes in less stress.

I enjoy the reference to a Gull and Fish and chips, identifying strongly with both references.

You might also consider, as brief and abstract as the piece may be, that many poets, E.B.B. being one, often worked their work for 5 to 10 years before being satisfied, and again, no offense, but this piece won't ever be inducted into that league.

Steven Wolf
Just my two "sense"

It sounds a little fishy to me and I'm not a gullible person.

Life couldn't have been too black if a seagull and some fish and chips made everything ok.

I am happy that you're happy now tho.

Life was black, and now it ain't
that seagull must have been a saint.
It turned my life around a bunch
and I ate fish and chips for lunch.

Now I'm happy, bright and cheery
no more blackness, dark and dreary.
Lunch was good, and now I'm full
all because of a dumb seagull.

You must be an Eric Cantona fan........Never mind!

idk...