Criticism welcome, one of my poems.. cigarette smoke and amnesia.?

Question:By some mistake, I seem to be getting tired
but for some reason, I had to write this
smoking more to hide the fact that i'm hiding
it's not that i'm afraid to go out

only what will happen if I do
all I have surrounding myself
is cigarette smoke and amnesia
short term memory loss, cause unknown
to those other then myself.

Maybe its just hidden too deep
or I have grown tired of searching
I keep waiting for the warmth to hold me
not to keep me safe, but to keep me insane
I truly like how my mind works...

Whether you are happy with it or not
It's a problem that is not one
but it is my own. So go ahead, cast your stones.
Your concrete ballots filled with your choices
because my dream was set long ago...
as soon as I could form thoughts of my own.

It's not my problem that I don't like
to listen to anyone else
it's my independence, my strength.
I don't push anyone away unless they
don't deserve to be there anyway.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: By some mistake, I seem to be getting tired
but for some reason, I had to write this
smoking more to hide the fact that i'm hiding
it's not that i'm afraid to go out

only what will happen if I do
all I have surrounding myself
is cigarette smoke and amnesia
short term memory loss, cause unknown
to those other then myself.

Maybe its just hidden too deep
or I have grown tired of searching
I keep waiting for the warmth to hold me
not to keep me safe, but to keep me insane
I truly like how my mind works...

Whether you are happy with it or not
It's a problem that is not one
but it is my own. So go ahead, cast your stones.
Your concrete ballots filled with your choices
because my dream was set long ago...
as soon as I could form thoughts of my own.

It's not my problem that I don't like
to listen to anyone else
it's my independence, my strength.
I don't push anyone away unless they
don't deserve to be there anyway.

Terrific theme and great style of writing, enjoyed every bit of it
Don’t listen to the idiots who see but only rhyming schemes
I think you would like to work on the draft though.

i was about to read it then looked at how long it was and skipped it and now i'm proceeding straight to judging it. its ok, but you could make it better with more colorful diction. Try to steer away from you incessant rambling though. ok hope that helps!

i see we're you were going with it and as it got longer it lost me for a second. i found my way thru it and have to say it is different and awkward at the same time. but i understand it to the fullest.

nice structure, understood your theme (i think) although it seemed a little tedious at times. could tighten it with more accurate wording maybe.