If you were my English teacher.....?

Question:... how would you grade this poem? i'm in 7th grade and we had to write a poem on respect and i tried to write one she'd like and what we learned but with my beliefs and i'm afraind i totally bombed so what do you think? please help... i'm "gifted and talented" and "totally scared and worried"?

These Two Worlds

There are two kinds of worlds I found
while traveling through this course,
of respect and trying to help each other;
They are the Anti and the For.

These worlds are just like neighbors:
Similar and different.
Things stand between them,
and with these two it’s apparent.

Peace and kindness makes them farther
than what they already are.
The Anti is against it all,
while the For thinks that’s bizarre.

The Anti is outrageous;
Full of hatred and twisted feelings.
They’re overflowed of judgments
with perverted and bloody reasonings.

The For is a settle place,
spirited with love and pride,
Respects everyone the way they are;
And would, no matter who, stand side by side.

So the worlds are tiffed at one another
on why they are so different.
One thinks of about invasion,
and the other thinks on how to pay the rent.

One wants the other better,
diverse and just like them.
The other doesn’t want to make any modifications,
to construct a new hem.

(continued on the next page for lack of space)

So this crisis still stands strong,
and no one does a thing,
to stop this chilling, wretched, hard disease,
that’s kills inside with a sting.

The For decides to leave
the Anti all alone
to solve this issue deeply
and leave it on there own.

The Anti rages on and on
without people to stop.
So murder rampages and phrases fly
and makes sadness globally want to pop.

So later the For tries to make it clear
that this violence needs to end.
They send a message to the other:
the curse is about to bend.

Leaders from both sides
gather to sit and discuss the crime.
The For steps up and says how they feel
about how they are hurt and why.

“You make us feel ridiculous
with a burning sense of passion.
It makes us very parsimonious
and in a very hurtful fashion.

“This needs to stop right away!
Please forgive us for our sudden outbreak
but we need to stop this painfulness
and it’s because of your sake”

“We understand, oh mighty For;
we’ve hurt you very deep.
We shall sign a treaty
and no more make you weep.”
So that is how things can be solved
without violence or hurting pressure.
Just tell the mean one how you feel
and it will stop, most for sure.

Don’t get angry with who
ever gets mad at you.
Just inform them your impression
and they will be stunned at how you do.

By Emily Ernsberger p2

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: ... how would you grade this poem? i'm in 7th grade and we had to write a poem on respect and i tried to write one she'd like and what we learned but with my beliefs and i'm afraind i totally bombed so what do you think? please help... i'm "gifted and talented" and "totally scared and worried"?

These Two Worlds

There are two kinds of worlds I found
while traveling through this course,
of respect and trying to help each other;
They are the Anti and the For.

These worlds are just like neighbors:
Similar and different.
Things stand between them,
and with these two it’s apparent.

Peace and kindness makes them farther
than what they already are.
The Anti is against it all,
while the For thinks that’s bizarre.

The Anti is outrageous;
Full of hatred and twisted feelings.
They’re overflowed of judgments
with perverted and bloody reasonings.

The For is a settle place,
spirited with love and pride,
Respects everyone the way they are;
And would, no matter who, stand side by side.

So the worlds are tiffed at one another
on why they are so different.
One thinks of about invasion,
and the other thinks on how to pay the rent.

One wants the other better,
diverse and just like them.
The other doesn’t want to make any modifications,
to construct a new hem.

(continued on the next page for lack of space)

So this crisis still stands strong,
and no one does a thing,
to stop this chilling, wretched, hard disease,
that’s kills inside with a sting.

The For decides to leave
the Anti all alone
to solve this issue deeply
and leave it on there own.

The Anti rages on and on
without people to stop.
So murder rampages and phrases fly
and makes sadness globally want to pop.

So later the For tries to make it clear
that this violence needs to end.
They send a message to the other:
the curse is about to bend.

Leaders from both sides
gather to sit and discuss the crime.
The For steps up and says how they feel
about how they are hurt and why.

“You make us feel ridiculous
with a burning sense of passion.
It makes us very parsimonious
and in a very hurtful fashion.

“This needs to stop right away!
Please forgive us for our sudden outbreak
but we need to stop this painfulness
and it’s because of your sake”

“We understand, oh mighty For;
we’ve hurt you very deep.
We shall sign a treaty
and no more make you weep.”
So that is how things can be solved
without violence or hurting pressure.
Just tell the mean one how you feel
and it will stop, most for sure.

Don’t get angry with who
ever gets mad at you.
Just inform them your impression
and they will be stunned at how you do.

By Emily Ernsberger p2

I can see you put a lot of thought in your poem and for a 7th grader it is not bad at all. The thing I liked the most about your poem is the concept you came up with dividing the "Anti" the bad people and the "For" the peace people. At a young age you seem to grasp the idea of good and evil in people and it's good you have something to express yourself with about how you feel about it. I don't know your teacher nor do I want to patronize you by acting like a teacher but I like it, "IF" I was your teacher I would give you a good grade.

8 and a half

p.s i am an english teacher

For seventh grade, it's pretty good. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll do fine.

I think you did a great job! It shows you put time and thought into it.

It sounds really good to me. I'd give you an A