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Question:Who am I?



Isolated in this land called a country,
It may look like it but we don’t all live freely.
People step over me like a crack in the sidewalk,
Never do they wonder how I became damaged never stopping long enough to hear me talk.
This is supposed to be the home of the brave,
But everyone jumps at the idea of someone living here that doesn’t behave.
Scared, scared of the people who speak out,
People who truly know what this country is all about.
Money, money fuels love, hate, crime, and good living,
Money is why I’m sitting where I’m sitting.
The thing that drops in my cup and makes me smile,
I bet they couldn’t walk in my shoes for a mile.
This country of the brave, free, and happy,
You haven’t seen this terrible country as I see it and it sees me.
Who am I that disrupt your vision of this false country?
The person with the cardboard sign that reads “Feed Me”


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Who am I?



Isolated in this land called a country,
It may look like it but we don’t all live freely.
People step over me like a crack in the sidewalk,
Never do they wonder how I became damaged never stopping long enough to hear me talk.
This is supposed to be the home of the brave,
But everyone jumps at the idea of someone living here that doesn’t behave.
Scared, scared of the people who speak out,
People who truly know what this country is all about.
Money, money fuels love, hate, crime, and good living,
Money is why I’m sitting where I’m sitting.
The thing that drops in my cup and makes me smile,
I bet they couldn’t walk in my shoes for a mile.
This country of the brave, free, and happy,
You haven’t seen this terrible country as I see it and it sees me.
Who am I that disrupt your vision of this false country?
The person with the cardboard sign that reads “Feed Me”

wow. as a reader that was very gripping, i never lost interest. i love poems that build to a point, nicely done. its so relateable and real. you have a real substance in your chosen topic and you really brought it all to the surface. you created a character and really put the reader in their shoes- phenomenal perspective. the flow and rhyme schemes worked well- it felt rythymic and very current to me.
great diction as well- your word choice makes this poem. It makes people think and feel and question- which is what every good poem should do. very well done. i look forward to your future postings.

wow.....that's ...........deep?

Wow, that's amazing. Great job, girly! *thumbs up*

I had goosebumps when I read your poem. It's sad and very true. Keep it up!

I like it and it makes me sad. Poetry is suupposed to make people feel so mission accomplished!

It's very good. You get a visual picture right away with the crack in the sidewalk part. I would like to see you replace a couple more parts with more visual words (for example, instead of "money" the second time you could say "green paper bills" but in your own words. Instead of "the thing" that drops in my cup...replace that with a word that someone can see. like coin, quarter, dime...

Excellent poem...I'm very impressed.

Well, that's a very interesting point of view.