Please read my poem...?

Question:It's really good I believe. I'm just stuck on one part. Go to my myspace blog to view it. >> www.myspace.com/ppseven

The part I'm stuck on is the last stanza which reads:

"I’ve searched the darkest mountains, I’ve searched the ocean blue, my search is now complete because I have finally found you."

Can anyone think of a word to substitute for darkest? I don't believe it fits in. Please give me your suggestions. Thank you.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: It's really good I believe. I'm just stuck on one part. Go to my myspace blog to view it. >> www.myspace.com/ppseven

The part I'm stuck on is the last stanza which reads:

"I’ve searched the darkest mountains, I’ve searched the ocean blue, my search is now complete because I have finally found you."

Can anyone think of a word to substitute for darkest? I don't believe it fits in. Please give me your suggestions. Thank you.

I read your poem and I liked a lot of your phrasing. But at the same time, I felt that it could flow better with simpler phrasing. You express your thoughts really well, it's just the "rhythm" of the poem that I feel needs a little polishing up. The words you chose to rhyme are very nice and fit together well. I'm just thinking a lot of the in-between wording could be simplified to make the poem flow more smoothly. You are definitely talented as a poet and I admire that. My criticism may or may not be worth much however because when I read some of the famous poetry I find myself just not getting it. They say that "Critics are legless men who teach running." So, that may be a description of me. Anyway, you asked for input and I gave it to you.

If you enjoy any kind of creative writing you should buy a Thesaurus. It gives you substitute words meaning the same as the word you don't want to use.

The following is from the PC version of the Merriam-Webster dictionary which includes a thesaurus. I highly recommend it. I got it from Staples. Good luck!

Main Entry:dark
Function:adjective

1 deficient in light *a dark room*
Synonyms caliginous, dim, dun, dusk, dusky, gloomy, lightless, murky, obscure, somber, tenebrous, unilluminated
Related Word cloudy, dull, shadowy, shady; pitch-black, pitch-dark
Contrasted Words bright, brilliant, luminous, radiant; enlightened, illuminated, illumined, lighted
Antonyms light
2
Synonyms CRYPTIC, Delphian, enigmatic, mystifying
Related Word abstruse, esoteric, hidden, occult, recondite; anagogic, cabalistic, darkling, mystic, mystical; complicated, intricate, knotty
Contrasted Words clear, perspicuous; easy, facile, light, simple
Antonyms lucid
3 of dark complexion *her dark good looks*
Synonyms bistered, black-a-vised, brunet, dark-skinned, dusky, swart, swarth, swarthy
Contrasted Words blond, fair, light; ruddy, tawny
|| 4
Synonyms BLIND 1, eyeless, sightless, stone-blind, visionless

It sounds lovely but I can't go onto myspace on this computer as i'm on my school's network (C2K) damm.

Steepest, largest, highest, rugged.
cloud tipped, skyscraped.

the highest

you should use ' tallest ' it works and means more

carnage, sleeping, havoc

that is a very nice peom i like it you shouldmake it a bit longer though are you also writting that to give it to a girl.

bleakest? cumbersome? harshest?secluded? shadowey? lofty? hope something helps :-)