How can you learn to be less judgmental?

Question: How can you learn to be less judgmental!?

I have this tendency to dislike people for reasons other than their personality!. I dislike people sometimes because of the lifestyle they choose!. I'm not talking about a person's sexual orientation!. I'm talking about promiscuous people!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

You know, everyone judges a bit!. Yeah, I don't agree with promiscuality either (I am abstinent!.) , and I really don't have to worry about this at my age, but as long as they are using protection, hopefully everything will be okay!. You don't have to be friends with them, but be nice to everyone, even if you don't agree!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Judgmental people generally have low empathy!. But this can be fixed!.
Empathy is understanding the emotions or experiences of other people: that is, having the ability to place oneself (mentally) in someone else's shoes!.

If you could imagine, for a while, what people feel or go through in certain situations, and understand them, you would be less likely to take an opinionated stance against them!.

also, you need to ask yourself how you would feel if you were adversely judged!. How would you like anyone to think of you negatively because of how you choose to live!.!.!. or how you choose to think about others!?

The best way is to be balanced, to be able to feel compassion for those whose situation you do not know well, and to agree to disagree about people without judging them!. This is a mature way that takes some learning!. We need to respect what we do not fully understand!.

Remember that we never ever really know what makes people do what they do!. I have no idea, for instance, why you asked this question, and what in your life is making you judgmental!. But it doesn't matter - I am not holding it against you!. I'm just answering you without judgment!. Okay!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

First a promiscuous person does not know they are promiscuous so if they are truly a person of that nature then it is not a choice it is what they are like a duck is a duck it does not know itself by definition it only knows its actions and becomes each one!. Second their promiscuiouty if that is how you spell it does not and should not concern you at all unless it is jealousy that you hold in your heart of the way they live!. Otherwise there is no need to even think of their life style!. What i mean is that if it was in your true nature and you had no control then you would not even notice that you disliked that type of person!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I have no complete answer for the question only a similar example!. The day came for me, when I started to live in a different life style and i began to see other people doing things I have not done and I asked why!? Why must I see these other law breakers doing these offensive unsightly things!. There is a reason for this sight and only you can bring yourself to the source for that understanding!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

Realize that your opinion is just that, YOUR opinion and that it ultimately does not matter!. When YOU realize that, then your inflated ego will allow you to quit making judgements at all!.

The sky is a pretty blue today - judgement
She is fat/ugly/pretty/hot/short/tall - judgement
I think the market will be worse tomorrow - speculative judgement
He or she is promiscuous - judgment

All (of the above) are examples of using judgement to be heard!.

It is our weak egos that cause us to make these types of statements!. You are drawing an artificial line between you and the object you are judging and simultaneously suggesting that YOU are worthy of having your judgment heard or known!. Let go of your 'self'!.
!.
!.
!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

unlearn it!.

letting and allowing things as they are is the root of love!.

understand, everyone (including yourself) is what they are
due to cause and condition!.

seeing everyone as the child they once were
helps break the (conditioned) urge to judge!.

everyone, including volitional jerks and haters
are the way they are due to their environment
and most folks dont have the capacity for introspection
which you have been graced with!.!.

without boundaries or hindrances in your processor
of grudges or regrets, without the resistance of fear or hate
without any resistance at all
within the eternal presence of mind
peace lay constantly wrapped in love
all ways here now!.
you are one with nature
the biggest illusion is that we are separate!.
that is why we are always searching for union!.
let it be!.

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Forget, for a moment , about being less judgemental!. Try learning to be less happy!. Can you do that !? Why not!? !. Is this because you like being happy and so you donot want to try even to be unhappy!? Am I right in saying that being non judgemental seems to be giving you happiness and when judgemental you feel unhappy!?
If we look deeply we find that it is OUR LIKING or DISLIKING that seem to decide our action!. Any emotion is like that !.
The moment you remove the aspect of liking or disliking then you are out of this problem!. How can we do that!? Please donot struggle with this thought of being judgemental!. Let the thought come and go!.Donot hold on to that thought and mull over it!. Let go!. Slowly you will find that you are not worrying about being judgemental or otherwise !.
You simply become a witness to the thought!. A spectator!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I can't!. I've already learned it!.

Understand that people are people!. As soon as you make an assessment that whatever so-and-so has done is wrong, chances are you can find a time in your life that you have been guilty of the same thing!. The easiest way to get over it is to look in a mirror each day and think of everything you've done and what you would think of someone else that had done the same things!. The "why's" don't matter, only the fact that you'd done them!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Judgment is an inseparable part of our system of cognizance!.!.!.!.!.!.!. hence can't be avoided totally!. In any case, judgment as such is not harmful, it is carrying a judgment too far is what creates the issues!.!.!.!. so long as we can continue to have an open mind on any judgment we make, there is no problem!.!.!.!.!. it is when we close our mind based on a judgment that the problem arises!. My own way of ensuring an open mind is to keep reminding myself all the time that nothing is too important and nothing is dead certain!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!. not even death, since its timing can never be predicted!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

What people do in private is their business; if they knew you, they might dislike aspects of you that you think are just fine!.
Live and let live and don't worry about things like this; you'll just be very angry and frustrated to no avail!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

In that case I'm judgemental too!
otherwise to be more non-judgemental!.!.!.EMPATHISE with the other person!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You can't!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

i'm optimistic!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Simple!.!.!.by knowing thy self!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

See them as a person and imagine what their life must really be like!.!.!.
It could be you out there and not them!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com