Is it morally correct?

Question: Is it morally correct!?

Is it morally correct to hate a member of your family, if you never let them know that you hate them, and you pretend you love him/her!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

It is all an illusion!. By seeing this family member through a filter of past experience or judgment is only imprisoning yourself!. If we allow ourselves to hate then on different levels we are clinging to all the negative feelings that cause us so much pain!. There is another way and that is to concentrate on the positive aspects of who ever it is!. Sometimes it may be only possible to love the person because when they exhale they make the plants happy!. It really doesn't matter what you morally feel is correct because by hating you are closing any door to reconciliation or forgiveness!. Personally I much prefer for someone to let me know that they hate me then to be false!.

Please let me know if my punctuation is ok too!. lolWww@QuestionHome@Com

Most people would consider that to be hypocritical!. That means it is not fair to the person you hate or yourself, and that makes it immoral!.

Do you know why you hate that member!? Might help in understanding yourself if you could get the hate under control!.

If the family member has done something to deserve your hate, you should talk about it with another family member!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Never could HATE a family member, so I don't understand these strong feelings or morality involved!. All I know is there will always be differences, as each one has a separate/different personality!. But could we not ride over these!?

Moreover, why not discuss things instead of pretending one way or the other!? Even if things seem irreconcilable we can continue to be polite/tolerant!. I've always believed in 'blood being thicker than water'!. But then your experiences must be different than mine!.!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

All you can do is try to get along when you are in situations when you have to!.

What would be the benefit of telling them you dislike them!. Will it change them overnight into someone you will like, or is it years of differing things they have said/done that has corroded any hope of a good relationship!. If so, avoidance is best, politeness when required!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's okay, of course!. My whole family has this huge hate triangle going around!. With me though, I'm more secretive about it, and usually the hate for an individual is off and on!. I try to talk to that person, tell them what it is that bugs me about them!. Whether it be drunkeness, Gambling, etc!.

It helps to talk to them, but not just blurt out the fact that you hate them!. Talking is the best medicine, after all!.

Bye :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

I find my self having more loving friends than family anyways
there are people in my family that i don't even pretend to love i just flat out hate, dispicable people in my family!. Just because we have the same blood doesn't mean I have to love them!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's never correct to hate anyone!.

My MIL is worthy of hate, but I try to pray for her instead, and pray for myself to understand!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

its alright to hate a family member, i do!. just as long as u dnt make things awkward and u arent a ouche bag its okay!. u cant like every1Www@QuestionHome@Com

i dont think so!.
you shouldnt hate anyone!.
but its hard to chnage the way you feel!.
pray about it!. :]Www@QuestionHome@Com

Love is a gift, not an obligation!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Morals!.!.!.morals!.!.!. To speak of 'morals' in the same breath with 'correct' is at first!.!.!. incorrect!.!.!. from the start!.

One must truly peer into this invention that is morality and come to know what its true purpose was meant to serve in the first place!. That morality has prevailed with all the litany and philosophical entreat got up by thinkers, which has ensued now for centuries, does not make it any closer to the heart and truth to life!. Morality is but an invention, invented by those who felt it was needed, then codified into the very fabric of thought and collective consciousness by career clerics down through the centuries -- so much so that morality tends to be the first word and description we give to that motive which we call "morality," when in reality we have the alternative today that barbaric societies in centuries and millennia earlier did not have, which is why morality was invented; along with marriage!. It was meant to serve as a central point, a damper, but which eventually became a tool of control!.

This may sound crass or harsh, but this is the case and genesis of much of this!.

That you hate or not hate is best settled by your proximity to self-honesty; abide what the heart tells you and then proceed to do no harm!.

Not all family members need be immeditate to one another!. That one is born into a family does not determine one is to remain with that family!. Sometimes the purpose for which a family is meant to serve may have fulfilled that purpose earlier in its given cycle of life, which, as with all family lines, was established by a extremely long tradition that has now become the norm and an assumed factor in one's life!.

For those families that live and love well together, we can say of this -- excellent!. But what of those for whom this is not the case!? Tradition has it that no matter what, do what one can to preserve the family; but this, if one looks more deeply, can be among the worst of advisories!.

Bear something in mind here: Dr Phil, for example, waxes long and poetically about the importance of family but fails to factor in that for a fair number of people, counseling to bring the featured disrupted families back together is exactly what should not be done: the family may well have reached the level of its productivity as a family and now is best to dissolve!.

This is a principle from which no family is exempt!.

Civilizations, planets, galaxies, even universes have come and gone, not because something was wrong -- much less was there something done immorally -- but simply because they completed their cycles, which the purpose they were created for has been served and is now completed!. Ancient ruins are ruins not necessarily because of some great natural cataclysm occurred but because life moves on, whole civilizations disband, unravel, evolve and grow, and they grow apart -- aside from there being wars or famines, which in themselves are parts of still greater cycles!.

And this about family herein given may come off to a reader of this as cold; may even come off as an "immoral" take; but nonetheless is this the truth -- a truth found in all life, and all things therein!. None is excepted from this great truth as regards the Cycles of life!.

That's all!.

As to hatred, that is a whole other matter!. Hatred is a corrosive energy!. For that and nothing more you would do well to be rid of it, though this make take time, even years -- but do what you will to be free of it!. While this hatred can harm this family member, this is true, you may rest assured that hatred will in due course undermine if not destroy 'you'!.

Problem is, your dark circumstance -- that of family -- is not a popular one, sadly, but one for which tradition does not give an option!. Truth is, family can be among the worst of enemies in many instances, but which tradition has it that we retain connection with one another because, well, tradition upholds the institution that is family!.

Outstanding is it to have a close, harmonious family but equally dreadful to bear with an inharmonious, destructive one!.

As to pretenses and affectations of love, well, you are best to stand down from this as well if you find that you cannot confront the dis-ease and extreme impasse between you and that family member!.

Sometimes circumstances simply have no resolve, and maybe and often this may well be the lesson that you need to learn in this life: -- know that some things simply have no solution and is better left in the hands of something greater than you and that family member, wherein the Healer that is Time settles it!. No cycle is exempt from that principle: family certainly is not!.

If you have done all that you can to make amends, then go and resolve to give that family person space!. Then proceed to do what you can to displace the extreme disdain (hatred) for that member by doing something far and wide and distant and with equal or greater import than the hatred you hold regarding that member, and which dark energy can be deposited elsewhere, somewhere in a repository and corner of this great universe where it can do no harm to anyone else!.

As to this thing morality, morality is but a tool of control; nothing more, nothing less, regardless of what the theologians and pulpit bangers in the Church and the handful of philosophers try to convince you!.

One knows within oneself already what is apt and resonant on any given matter without a need for the concoction that is morality!. For moralism is but another turn, say, is but a form of a tax that one should have no cause or need to pay!. You are to be responsible for and to yourself ultimately and to be always and at least economical in terms of how you direct and use your energy, whether regarding a family member or some other person in another corner of this great planet!.Www@QuestionHome@Com