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Question: More help please!.!.!.!.!.!.!?
ok I have trust issues with my husband!.!.!.!.he has never done anything MAJOR to earn this distrust just little things here and there!. i've been told that the lack of trust comes from my unhappiness with myself and i need to find the root of it!.
firstly !.!.!.Do you agree this is the root to my problem!?
secondly!.!.!. What are effective methods for improving my self esteem and over outlook of myself!.!.!.to where i can have a normal healthy relationship with my husband!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
First of all, good question!.
The problem stems from your husband and not you!. As a direct result of his affections, or lack thereof, you have manifested a "trust" complex!. There could be a million reasons that attribute to this but that is the most common!. The insecurity you feel is because your husband is not giving you what you need!. This is very common in marriage! But there should always be a mutual respect and trust!. Without them, there is no relationship! Just two old friends sticking to a promise!.!.!.!.
I gave you the short version!. But what I recommend is you speak with one of two professionals!.!.!.
1) Marriage Councilor / Family Therapist
-or-
2) Christian Marriage Councilor / Family Therapist
I also recommend a road trip!. No planes or trains, just regular ole cross country road trip in a vehicle!. There are many reasons for the trip, but with any luck, you both can leave the pressures behind you and reconnect your souls!.
Good luck and God Bless!Www@QuestionHome@Com
Generally, people who are distrusted will often eventually substantiate the distrust!. In other words, someone who is not prone to being unfaithful will become unfaithful simply because they are not trusted!. On the other hand, an otherwise unfaithful person, in a truly trusting relationship, may find it unnecessary to cheat!. That being said, it is important that when the little things, that get you worried, happen you need to work it through by rationally deciding if it is anything to worry about!. Men are rewarded for their barbaric actions by their peers!. They get together, gawk at women, whistle call, talk about our 'hooters' and that feels good and they are validated as men!. Your husband glances at a woman, in his head all these things are going on-he is thinking about what his buddies would do if they saw her, in his mind he is whistle calling, expanding the 'hooters' and validating himself but out of respect for you the glance is just momentary!. He doesn't intend to do anything about it, he just needs to know he is still able to experience the caveman inside him!. Fortunately-this behavior diminishes with age and so does your fear of it, kind of a chicken and the egg thing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
The fact still remains that he has lied over the little things that make you not trust him completely!.Do/did you have trust issues from your past!?If he lies over the little stuff ,its hard to trust in the major stuff too!.Talk to him and point this fact out to him and see if it'll help!.What kind of unhappiness could led to trust issues except the fact that the other person isn't being honest !.Especially over silly little things!.You need to figure out how to handle the lying!.Then when that is resolved you'll probably be happier!.
Good LuckWww@QuestionHome@Com
Well if he has never done anything to make u not trust him then u need to trust him!. Yes u need to be happy with yurself before u can trust anybody!. Talk to a counsler that may helpWww@QuestionHome@Com
I think you have a problem because you've stated that your husband has not done anything!.
Do you have poor self-esteem!? Are you fat!?Www@QuestionHome@Com