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Question: Is this a mid-life crisis!?
I think of it differently!.
I'm a painfully average guy!. I have a working class income & lifestyle and I'm a good husband & father!. I'm lucky enough to have a job where I get to direclty help people; I'm competent at it but clearly not destined for professional greatness!. I'm a distance runner, but not an especially good one, and I've yet to discover any artistic/musical talents!.
I can accept my limitations and the fact that I probably won't ever achieve wealth, power or fame!. At least I'm fulfilling my responsibilities as a husband, father and citizen!.
What I can't accept is the notion of leading a life that is boring and unremarkable!. When my life flashes before me on my deathbed, I don't want it to be a montage of minivans, trips to Costso and mowing my lawn!.
How can I incorporate something unique and interesting into my life in a way that doesn't compromise my responsibility as a husband, father and member of my community!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
how about having the family plan an annual adventure!? have the kiddies help research and gather information about a place, map things out to do while there, rent a trailer - then everyone keeps a journal of the trip!. You might also engage everyone in setting/tracking a monetary goal!. when you come back, create a collective scrapbook and/or photo presentation and each share their story/viewpoint/most memorable, etc!. Make this the family's annual effort!.
If you don't include your family, anything else will just take time away from acting as a unit - such as writing fiction, volunteering somewhere, taking a course or two, learning to play an instrument, build furniture, etc!.
btw, there's nothing wrong with being an average guy with a home, a job, and a loving family!. lots of folks don't even have that!. so, if you only need a little drama in your life, join a theater group - seriously!Www@QuestionHome@Com
Write something!. Even if it is only for your family!. Words are something that you can pass down to every generation that precedes you!.
Get involved with something or someone who inspires you!.
Buy an instrument and use it, even if you never learn to play it the "right" way!.
Teach your children something that they could only learn from you!.
I think the greatest lesson we can ever learn from our elders, is to live life so that we never have any regrets!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
maybe the begginings of one, but it sounds pretty mild!. You need to find something that gives YOU meaning, that's all that matters!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
let your kids teach you something that only they can do!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
You could take up metaphysical studies, and get beyond (meta) this physical world!.!.!.!.fame and those things are a trap for humans, who need to learn to place the heart first!. Sounds like you are taking advantage of such opportunities in this lifetime!.!. This makes your life remarkable, because very few make a committment to serving others as a self-aware, independent, individual!. Youhave probably done the trips of being muli-talented and powerful in other lives when you were a young soul!. Whatever talent you really need to discover now, for the sake of your soul's purpse, will be revealed!. Nice guys actually finish first, perhaps not in this illusion, but in Reality!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Sounds like the beginning of a crisis to me if you do not beware!. I feel for you though and sort of understand what you are going through though I am a single man!. I too would like to show responsibility for my existence but I want to make a mark on the world!. I believe that is what I understand you also to be communicating!. Writing a book about your life experiences would somewhat help to leave that mark but you can also take solace in the thought that you have left good kids on this planet that Willl grow up to do something possibly something great and you wil be part of that!. With that thought in mind give your kids and extra hug and ask them to do something in your memory when you have left God's green earth and continue to be an upstanding member of your community!. What people remember about you will always be your greatest legacy!. Do that and when you lay down to close your eyes for that last time and look back on your life you will be able to say in the end That you did your best and you felt it was all good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Ah!. The age-old dilemma!. There are a few things you can do!.
One, go out of your way to volunteer or help!. Of course, you can't let this get in the way of work or your family, but maybe you can take your kid(s) with you to volunteer at the local SPCA once a month, or donate even a little bit of money (I'm talking a dollar or pocket change) to charity or create encouraging hand-drawn cards for kids at hospitals through an organization!. Helping someone else's life will certainly make you feel needed!.
Two, try something new and bring along a family member!. In the sources section, I've included a nice website to help get you started with some goals!. Sometimes, it helps to read other people's goals!.
You also mentioned that you haven't tapped into any artistic or musical talents yet, which suggests that the desire is there!. Maybe you could take an art class at the local community college!. Something simple like pottery, maybe!. I personally thought I had no creative ability until I took an art class after a six-year hiatus from artwork, and now I make art daily!. There's no limit to what can be done with some bright-coloured 54-cent acrylic paints purchased at Wal-Mart!.
You could also pick up a new instrument and try to learn it, either by yourself or with lessons!. Since you're a family man and a hard worker, this may seem like an unrealistic goal, but if you put in so much as 15 minutes daily and you have reasonable motivation, it could end up being a great hobby!. Not a career, maybe, but it'll give some flava to your life!.
Reading new books and watching new movies can also be helpful to add new depth to your life!. You could test out different genres, different authors, or just stick with familiar genres and authors that you haven't read yet!. PostSecret is also interesting and inspiring and it makes you feel so much less alone; I've provided the link below!.
Aside from all that, you could try visiting a new place once a week or once a month!. And I'm not talking long-distance; that should be reserved for special vacations, I guess!. I'm just talking visiting new shops that you've always known about but never gone into or talking to new people!. Inevitably, taking a class would introduce you to new people!. And you may wonder why you need new people when you have your family, but it's always thrilling to make new friends, even if they won't ever be your wife or kids!.
I think you'll be fine!.
Oh! I almost forgot!. There's a book, "Learning to Love You More," by Harrell Fletcher and Miranda July!. It's very artsy, very avant-garde, but the activities in the book are amazing and priceless and family-friendly!.Www@QuestionHome@Com