How do you "let go" - what is your process?

Question:When you know its time to close a chapter in your life, what is your personal process for moving on and leaving people, things, thoughts, behaviors, etc.... behind?

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: When you know its time to close a chapter in your life, what is your personal process for moving on and leaving people, things, thoughts, behaviors, etc.... behind?

To let go: It means to leave all sort of controls you have on what stops you from moving on. Things, thoughts, behaviors or everything, leave this behind, it's over, no more, it's finished. As long as we hang on to a person, we think, we remember, we bring upon things we've done with him, all. So we have to slowly quit thinking of that one, forget some memories, words said. Although, this is progressive, it comes on time, bit by bit, like one day at a time and slowly we manage to lessen that control on him, we let go, we forgive, forget, it's going away from us, it's getting behind us.
See what I mean? Think, it's not easy, it hurts, it takes time, but we pull through. Then we, one day, feel more at ease with that. We're free, we've let go!
Take care.

Open a new chapter. When you finish with a book you get a new one.

Sometimes it is hard to move on and let go but if it is necessary then I find a way. I try to prepare for it ,If I have time I have a party, or a lunch, write an email or send a goodbye gift. I always express my regrets with sincerity. But if I am leaving because I no longer trust the situation or the person/people then I let them know that as well.

I convince (delude) myself that the people, things, thoughts, behaviors, etc. don't exist, and it works every time.

When you lose something, even when it is a mutual decision you need to mourn. You might mourn for all the hopes you had for the future, for what you thought that person would be in your life. You need to grieve for the emptiness that has been created. It doesn't mean that it is the end of your happiness but it does mean that it is the end of the story with that person. You have to allow yourself to feel the sadness, even the anger and the confusion. In real life, closure very rarely happens. T.V. ties things up so nicely for its characters but in real life sometimes there is no answer, or chance to say goodbye. We aren't always ready. Society says get drunk, get high, or find someone else quickly so you don't hurt. I think that just puts off the healing. Feel the pain, face it and heal. It will subside.
Write about it, talk to friends, family or a counsellor.
Give yourself time and don't be bullied into moving on before you are ready. You will do better than the people who lie to themselves. You've suffered damage and need to heal. Get involved in other things that don't take you back to the same places. I wish you best of luck.

mind over matter, that is all that it takes.

Judge yourself, take responsibility, accept your faults and move on to a higher level...

Good luck!

letting go simply happens, when we live in the present moment, instead of turning the wheels of the past in our minds over and over again.

once there was a group of monks, wandering back to the monastery... on the way there was a huge puddle of mud, and a young lady with a beautiful saree, that wanted to cross the road. one of the monks went to her, took her on his arm and carried her over the puddle.
then the minks went on with the journey. after 4 hours another monk says to the mink that had carried the girl: "really, that was not right, you know we are not suposed to have contact with women." the first monk said: "oh, you still carry her? i dropped her 4 hours ago".
this is the way we live... we go on carrying the past, even though it is already gone.
children identify strongly with their toys, they scream and shout, but once the toy is gone, it is gone, then they go on with the next thing. they live intensely, they suffer intensely, they experience anger intensely, they scream, they stomp, but once the emotion has gone through the whole system, they are pure again. they don't hold on to it, they dont make a story.
the only thing we need to let go is our past story, that we still carry in our minds. once we see, how precious it is to live consciously in the present moment, how alive life can be, by living in the now, instead of constantly looking through the filter of past memories, old judgements, past fears... when we see what a burden these memories are and how they prevent us from being happy in the now, then letting go happens by itself. one cannot DO it, it happens, when we understand...