Why are people so short-sighted re: marriage?

Question:such a flawed institution! I mean, how can you make a promise that you will love someone forever if the bond you're making forces you to stay together? Love is not a business contract, which is basically what marriage is. I feel lucky as I awake in the morning and make the choice to stay with my lover.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: such a flawed institution! I mean, how can you make a promise that you will love someone forever if the bond you're making forces you to stay together? Love is not a business contract, which is basically what marriage is. I feel lucky as I awake in the morning and make the choice to stay with my lover.

It's a cultural value. It gets passed down even if it is no longer relevant.

Honestly, there's probably some socioeconomic changes that have happened, but in large part it's because the religious emphasis has been almost totally removed.

The religions of the book all instruct people to vow to stay together prior to engaging in the processes of "kid-making." OBVIOUSLY the moral implication is it would be better for the kids if they were actually stuck to it. The equating of it to anointment is just to elevate the importance of such an oath.

The real world raminifcation is obvious, and directly related to what I just said. Kids tend to do better when they have both their biological parents looking after them. It just depends whether we consider that to be important anymore.

Obviously we don't.

and your point is?

i agree with you. i think that marriage is what society expects from people. the perfect situation for me is that i have my place and he has his place. we never fall into a routine plus we still have our own space.

Even if it is a result of a societal construction, there is still something very nice and comfortable about being married. There's a great security in knowing your with someone who has decided that they are confident in telling you that they will love you forever and knowing that you are confident in telling them the same. Sure, everybody knows about the divorce rate and that forever doesn't always mean forever. You can make promises and change your mind later. Still, knowing that you both are ready to make that promise provides a sense of stability that relaxes both people and can enhance the feelings of love more.

There's also something nice about standing up and declaring it before your friends and family once and for all, "This is the person I intend to be with for the rest of my life, and she is part of my family now."

I understand your point and perhaps marriage is not for you, but the institution isn't inherently shortsighted either, whatever it's problems.

And I feel lucky as I awake in the morning and make the choice to stay with my husband.

A marriage is only as flawed as the two people in it, and commitment to another person (married or not) is a total act of will.

In stating that marriage is a flawed institution, you imply that the alternative, not being married, is somehow inherently superior.

In the western world particularly, this is evidentially untrue, when considering the benefits to society as a whole.

Monogamous marriage has been a feature of virtually all societies, throughout known history. It is feasible that humans are genetically pre-disposed to marry.

Genetic variation allows for a vast range of pre-dispositions. It is therefore unsurprising that some people will be better off unmarried.