Why am i like, forbidden to act?

Question:it has always been my dream to be an actress. My mom is not supportive of me, and neither is my sister. the only one in my family is my oldest sister, and its because she knows what it is like when my mom doesnt support you. She knows the amount of days that i was crying because my mom said "it was a waste of my time" and I signed up for this thing at a mall that was looking for actresses, singers, & models. So i went over looking for acting, my mom came up behind me and the lady asked if it was something that she would let me do, and she was like "UH NO!!!" and so i stormed out crying, and my mom didnt care. My oldest sister wants to sing, and my mom thinks she cant. i dont get why. i think she has something against being famous. like, maybe when she was little, her mom didnt let her do what she wanted, either
how do i get to NY without her blowing up? how do i explain that this is the only thing i ever wanted?
also, any acting exercises you guys know of that can help me? thanks!

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: it has always been my dream to be an actress. My mom is not supportive of me, and neither is my sister. the only one in my family is my oldest sister, and its because she knows what it is like when my mom doesnt support you. She knows the amount of days that i was crying because my mom said "it was a waste of my time" and I signed up for this thing at a mall that was looking for actresses, singers, & models. So i went over looking for acting, my mom came up behind me and the lady asked if it was something that she would let me do, and she was like "UH NO!!!" and so i stormed out crying, and my mom didnt care. My oldest sister wants to sing, and my mom thinks she cant. i dont get why. i think she has something against being famous. like, maybe when she was little, her mom didnt let her do what she wanted, either
how do i get to NY without her blowing up? how do i explain that this is the only thing i ever wanted?
also, any acting exercises you guys know of that can help me? thanks!

I don't believe you should be forbidden to act. I think that acting and theatre can open minds, ease pain, and brighten days.

Having said that, there are lots of reasons why a parent would not want a child to be an actress. Here are some of them.

1) The top actors all belong to actor's unions. These unions help maintain standards within the industry, provide retirement and pension plans, help share knowledge, and ultimately help actors get paid more. But, these unions have 98% unemployment rates pretty much all the time. That means, at any given point, 98% of the people in the union are not working as actors. And, many actors who join the unions never get another union job again because it is so competitive, they don't have what is marketable, and they are prevented from taking job that are not union jobs.

2) Add to this the fact that it is near impossible to make a decent living as an actor because there are simply millions of people who believe they are, or can be, actors. And, for every one of you, there are hundreds of people with a similar look, story, and dream. If you think you are meant to be an actor because you sit and stare out the window and dream of it, you are not alone. That is pretty much the experience of everyone who wanted to act. Of course, not all. But, most jobs do not pay very much and certainly do not come up frequently enough to make living easy.

3) Unless you are a performer or artist, it is next to impossible to understand doing something that cannot be quantified. Further, to think that someone would risk everything for something that is so undefinable and measurable is ridiculous. People simply do not know how to support actors emotionally, mentally, or financially. I've encountered it all my life. They all have your best interests in mind, but they don't understand that what we feel is best for us is different. And, they'll never understand because they care for you. They will never get it unless you succeed. And, they'll often be a negative thing in your life as your fight to try to be who you want to be.

4) Most actors who get jobs and work, don't get paid or paid very much. And, it takes a very long time to make it big. While you are scraping by trying to be famous, you are not acquiring any retirement funds that will support you in the likely event that you do not make it. Becoming famous is like winning the lottery. The difference is, big lotteries are won hundreds of times every year. But, only a couple people might become famous every year. On top of that, only a fraction have a career that lasts or has longevity.

5) For every 'overnight' success, there are an average of eight to ten years of blood, sweat, and tears. And, I don't mean just sitting and dreaming, but beating the street, meeting people, making impressions, getting rejected ten to one. And, all this time, people will continually ask you...

'Are you famous, yet?'
'Did you get the part?'
'What are you in right now?'
'Are you getting paid?'
'What have you done?'
'When are you going to get a real job?'
'You're an actor, but you're not in a show?'

6) There are many people who claim they can make you a star, but almost no one can. In fact, the days of studios grooming someone into a star are pretty over. Now, they expect a fairly complete product so they just have to put you out there. That means a lot more work on your own and likely that your 'look' will get you nothing.

7) Broadway actors may get a contract for six months to a year. That may pay you $60 to $100 thousand for the year, but after that, you'll be left without a job. And, those are the few who get to Broadway. Imagine your life while your struggling to get there.

8) You'll likely have to leave home if you want to be successful and make a living. And, you'll be at the mercy of people who want your money more than they want you to be famous. You'll be learning lessons from lots of people who may not have the ideas your parents believe in.

9) Being a great actor (or great at anything) isn't a born gift. It takes immeasurable practice, sheer will, belief, compassion, and determination. Michael Jordan wasn't born able to play how he did. He worked every day of his life harder than anyone to become that. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart's hands suffered from the sheer amount of time he wrote and played music. If you just want to be an actor and have no concept of the fact that it takes more work than you've probably every put into something in your life, then I suggest you learn to learn to dream of something else.

Listen, none of the ideas are absolute. I've had many adults support me unequivocally. But, they've often been people who were struggling themselves. They were people who never stopped dreaming because their lives didn't turn out how they had hoped. The people who rarely seemed to support or understand were people who built a fairly stable home and had job and family security and provided for the future.

Personally, I don't want people who just care about fame to become actors. It makes actors look bad. It reduces the quality of acting. And, they just don't deserve the potential payoff.

So, ask yourself 'why?' you want to become an actor. That is an important question. And, if the answer is honest, true, and artistic... you will likely find your own answer about the future. It's up to you. It is your life and you only get one - so live it the way you want.

Take risks for financial abundance and ego trip? Take risks to create art and affect lives? Enjoy what movies and music make you feel, but find a stable home and love and build a family you feel proud of?

Some people might say, 'do what makes you happy', but until you've experienced what it's like to dream and dream and suffer and be rejected and succeed only to feel like you then move backward, you will not be able to know if the pursuit makes you happy. That is why I say it must be about the art and craft.

Finally, I will say that if you do go for your dream and you don't 'make it', like people like to call it, you could possibly use your lessons to educate other young dreamers like yourself. And, that doesn't sound like a bad life to me.

Good luck in your decision. You are young and have time to decide.

Jennifer Lopez's mother was very un-supportive of her daughter having a career in Hollywood. Once she called home crying because something had gone wrong with an audition or something and her mom basically told her 'I told you this was a bad idea from the start, so don't call me crying'. That made her toughen up, and look at her now!

Maybe your mom thinks that being an actress or a singer is not supportive enough. (money wise) I know that both my mother and elder sister got acting degrees and now think that they wasted their time and money, because they are not currently getting paid for it. But you know what?? Follow your dreams!!! Be happy!!!! If you want to be an actress, be an actress!!! Don't let your mother hold you back!!

Unfortunatly,this is a clasic. It sounds like your Mom,in some twisted way,thinks she's saving you dissappointment ot embarassment by not allowing you to puruse your dream.What she doesn't realize is that the most she pulls,the more you will and,if you're tough enough,you'll go ahead and do it anyway.Try out for school plays anything that'll give you some experiance.Watch experts to see how it's done(you can probably distinguish good acting from bad)it's all about telling the truth,no matter if it's drama,comdey,satire or whatever.By the way,Barbra Streisand's Mom did everything she could(including telling her she wasn't"pretty enough"to be a performer and you see hoe well THAT worked)If you have to go to NY go all he can do is blow up.And she'll get over it.

j have shayna take u. prove ur mom wrong! she prob dont want u 2 be disapponted cause she loves u.

I am a music director, and have taught in the public schools also since 1971. I am re-reading your post - because you never say anything about classes you take, or lessons, or shows you have been in , or dance or voice classes - just YOU WANNA. Signing up at the mall is a bug waste of time - they just want your contact info to try to sell you something, like second-rate lessons, or photos. If you have to ask HERE about *any acting exercises can help* - then that makes it plain that you are NOT anywhere near ready to think about *going to NY*. When you present yourself to an agent, it means you are READY READY READY to be EMPLOYED - all your instruction is DONE, and you have loads of successful experience. The *drama* and tears at home is not going to do this - you need instruction and experience. An in your post, you do not tell us you have EITHER of those yet. I would guess from your writing that you are maybe 13 or 14 - get studying if you intend to major in theater or drama in college.

I can't say i know what you mean, because i sing and my family has always supported me, but i think i can help with your situation. My advice is to do a school play or local (community) production and get her to come so she can experience how good you are, and maybe that will change her mind! The only way to explain that this is the only thing you've ever wanted is to say it, bold and clear. Sit her down and say something along the lines of 'Mom, you know i have never disobeyed you. But if i dint start planning my life now, i have got to be disobeying you. Acting is what i want to do with my life, and whether or not it's a waste of time is my decision, because it's my future. And it's time i start preparing myself for it.' If i were your mom, I'd be impressed with how serious you are about your future.

For acting exercises- pick up a book from your library on the origins of drama, pantomime, acting warm ups, improvisation starters, or monologues for young adults.