I'm obsess with my band teacher, what can I do about it?

Question:I'm obsess with her, I'm straight and everything, but she's such an amazing musician that i kind of idolize her... Is that bad?
I love hanging out in the band room cuz I have a great time with her and everything, and she's the reason why i go to school. What can I do about it?

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I'm obsess with her, I'm straight and everything, but she's such an amazing musician that i kind of idolize her... Is that bad?
I love hanging out in the band room cuz I have a great time with her and everything, and she's the reason why i go to school. What can I do about it?

This preoccupation isn't necessarily bad. It all depends on how you respond to it.

Clearly this teacher has made an enormous impact on you. If you choose to idolize her, to make her a role model, to let her inspire you, then great--that's a terrific student-teacher relationship.

However, when you say "I'm not gay or anything" it indicates that you may be feeling (ahem!) inappropriate types of attraction? Well, that's something you need to manage, if true.

First, don't beat yourself up about it. Feeling sexual attraction for others is just plain old normal, if it never happened then we'd go extinct!

Realize that strong attraction to another of the same gender doesn't indicate homosexuality--now, as time goes on, you will learn more about your personal gender orientation, and you may find that boys really don't excite you and girls do--in which case your life may be more difficult in this culture (and impossible in others). But at this point, understand that most people get crushes on their teachers at some point, and most hetero people experience (rarely) attraction to same-sex people. Except in very few cases where the teacher loses the license and goes to jail, the student gets over it and starts to pursue age-appropriate relationships.

So think of your attraction to this teacher as that of young woman to mentor--student to role model. Understand that one day you'll get to the point where your abilities could match or exceed hers--and that will be a testament to the good education she inspired you to.

Realize that admiration is nice but perspective is great. She is a human just like you and got where she is by talent and working hard and that if you work hard you can be like her someday.

Keep going to school =)

The qualities that we admire in others are those we want and need to develop in ourselves. You actually already know you have those same abilities. List her qualities and work on them.