My last name is *****, but I'm not blood related to anyone with that name. Do I

Question:

My last name is *****, but I'm not blood related to anyone with that name. Do I add them to my family tree?

It's a long story, but my last name comes from a man my grandmother married to give my father a last name. She divorced him soon after, and the man has never been a part of our lives. We are not blood related to anyone with this last name, but because we still carry the same last name, should we research and add this "other" family to our family tree? If I ever had children I know they would wonder what happened to their long lost "grandfather." What should I do?

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Your question comes up constantly in genealogical circles, usually when someone is adopted, or one of the biological parents leaves early through death, divorce or desertion, and the child is raised by someone to whom they are not related.

It boils down to family history vs. genealogy. Genealogy is the study of genes - biological ancestors, or biological descendants. The strict genealogists use the example of Romulus and Remus, the two mythological founders of Rome, as their example; they say that if you insist on including adopted parents in your tree, their mother would be that she-wolf who raised the two, not the woman who abandoned them in the forest.

The "Family History" advocates, arguing for including the adoptive parent(s) say "look, this man (it is usually a father) raised the child, taught him to work hard, shoot straight and speak the truth. He was there when the kids broke ther arms, learned to ride a two-wheeler, made the honor roll. He deserves the credit."

In your case, it sounds like your dad got all of his instructions for life from his mother, with (we hope) some help from a favorite teacher, coach or minister. It sounds like you have a big fat "UNKNOWN" where the paternal grandfather should be, since Grandma never told.

You can research that family if you like; it is one more jig-saw puzzle, and some of them were probably interesting people. You shouldn't put them in your family tree.