Here we go, desperate tortured poetry for a happy saturday. Please comment?

Question:

Here we go, desperate tortured poetry for a happy saturday. Please comment?

I can't remember the last time I felt pain,
The real kind, where blood flows down the drain.
Emotionally I'm a wreck, dripping with agony,
But real pain is another thing, numb can't you see?

My arms look like a map of hell, red lines everywhere,
People look and stare at them, as if I give a care.
If they knew the hell I wallow in, the depths of depravity,
When I finally get to hell, I'll fit right in that little society.

Sometimes I sit and wonder, and stab myself with pins,
Play some music real loud, drip hot wax upon my skin.
I'm running out of things to do, just to get myself to feel,
I must admit it though, I'm addicted to the cold blue steel.

When my time is over here, an finally I've taken my own life,
I don't want anyone to cry, or fill their lives with strife.
I've gone to a better place my friend, with my razor blade,
The sky is gray, the grass is wet, finally, I fade away.

This is a rewrite dedicated to Alyssa and Brad

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: its good.

Alyssa and Brad must have done something horrible... sorry about that.