Poem: Just Another 15-Minute Love Poem (your thoughts?)?

Question:

Poem: Just Another 15-Minute Love Poem (your thoughts?)?

I rarely use rhyme in poems because I'm not good at it. This is a practice piece just to get a little more comfortable, and I do know that I'm breaking the rhyme deliberately at some points.

Just Another 15-Minute Love Poem

I'll love you for one evening
if you'll promise to go away.
There's no point in staying
you'll be better of this way

For there's pain in loving moments,
and pleasure in painful trysts.
Commitments last only for seconds
while there are years lost in a kiss

So let's take love where we find it,
but let's take each other first.
I'll feeed you with your hunger,
if you'll quench me with my thirst.

Additional Details

2 weeks ago
Actually, call girl? Never entered my mind. I had in mind the majority of trivial petty relationships that you can get for free.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: 2 weeks ago
Actually, call girl? Never entered my mind. I had in mind the majority of trivial petty relationships that you can get for free.